Vandelay, Van-de-lay, Vandelay, Vand-uh-ley… however you say it, what an awesome performance! In the highest scoring game of the season, Vandelay Industries managed to top sprouts’ 110 points by posting the 2nd highest score of the year, 122 points. They did it with terrific performances from Matt Forte (27 pts), Andrew Luck (26 pts) and Demarco Murray (20 pts). (Luck and Murray, coincidentally, are the top QB and RB in fantasy). Vandelay Industries becomes the first team to win a second Weekly High Score Prize this year. This extends Vandelay’s league leading total points scored to 589, which is 36 points ahead of the next closest team. Way to go, Louis!!
Tough break for sprouts being the second highest scoring team of the week, but running into a buzz saw. Scoring 110 points in a loss ranks as the 7th highest score in a loss in Sacred Sundays league history. James holds the record for highest score in a loss, having scored 118 in a losing effort last year. Really goes to show what a crucial factor scheduling can be. More stats on point scoring below.
Now regarding the league standings, that gentle hum you hear in the distance is the Fantasy gods chanting “oohhmm”, as we have achieved a perfect balance. There is one team at 5-1, one team at 1-5…two teams at 4-2, two teams at 2-4…and four teams at 3-3. The yin and the yang are perfectly aligned. The moon is in the Seventh House, and Jupiter has aligned with Mars. This is the dawning of the age of Aquarius!Onward!
THE GOOD ONES
-Tom Brady, QB – Sofa King Mediocre – 33 pts – Just when everyone thinks that Tom Brady is washed-up and can’t throw a football, he goes and does something like this. And TOTALLY REDEEMS HIMSELF!
-Cam Newton, QB – Channel 4 News Team – 33 pts – Teams want their best player carrying the football, and if you have Cam Newton on your team, he is probably your best player. Cam rattled off 107 yards and a TD on 17 carries, plus had 284 passing yards and 2 TD’s.
-Joe Flacco, QB – Free Agent – 32 pts – It didn’t take long for Flacco to start putting up points as he threw 4 touchdowns in the first quarter! Finished with 5 for the game, which is actually a bit of a letdown when you figure he was on pace for 16.
-T.Y. Hilton, WR – Joe’s Pats – 31 pts – Tyrone’s Youngin’ was 9-for-9 on targets to receptions, and finished with 223 yards and a touchdown. Quarterbacks gotta love a receiver who catches every ball they throw his way…
-Colin Kaepernick, QB – American BadAss – 28 pts – The 49ers were looking like they might get shut down until Kaepernick hit Brandon Lloyd on an 80-yard touchdown pass. After that, the Rams pretty much rolled over and let Kaep eat ‘em up for 343 yards passing and 3 TD’s.
-Matt Forte, RB – Vandelay Industries – 27 pts – Three straight 100-yard games and his fourth on the season. Forte is the 3rd ranked back in Fantasy through 6 weeks.
-Andrew Luck, QB – Vandelay Industries – 26 pts – It must be something about having a horseshoe on your helmet that makes you score tons of fantasy points. Luck is the overall point leader thus far, having scored 157 points which is 26 points more than the next closest (Philip Rivers).
-Aaron Rodgers, QB – American BadAss – 25 pts – Here’s a stat for you…Rodgers has thrown 14 touchdowns and one interception in his last five games. Damn!
-Jay Cutler, QB – Fantasy Nightmare – 25 pts – Cutler racked up 381 yards passing (his career high as a Bear), yet somehow only threw one touchdown pass.
-Arian Foster, RB – Coors Light Drunk Guys – 25 pts – If Foster can stay healthy he is dangerous. In his four healthy games this season, he has four 100-yard games. This week he had 141 total yards (109 rushing, 32 receiving) plus two touchdowns. Uh yeah, I’ll take it.-Philip Rivers, QB – Midnight Maulers – 25 pts – Were it not for Andrew Luck having a monster of a season, Rivers would be the toast of the town. Get this, he has 15 touchdown passes to only 2 interceptions.
COME ON, MAN
-Chargers, DEF – Scottish Rebels – 1 pt – Gave up 28 points to the Raiders? Really? The Oakland Raiders? What in the hell...
-Jeremy Maclin, WR – Coors Light Drunk Guys – 1 pt – After having at least 10 targets per game for the first five games, Maclin only saw the ball come his way three times on Sunday.
-Heath Miller, TE – Coors Light Drunk Guys – 1 pt – Miller only has one touchdown on the season thus far. Clearly he didn’t add to that total this week.
-Shayne Graham, K – Joe’s Pats – 0 pts – Hard for a kicker to score points when his team ain’t playin’! Check your roster Joe!
-Niles Paul, TE – Midnight Maulers, 0 pts – Two weeks in a row of zero points is not a good trend to be on.
-Travis Kelce, TE – Channel 4 News Team – 0 pts – Timmy refuses to drop any Kansas City Chiefs players even if it means playing a bye-week tight end. That is commitment!
SAFETY IN (HIGHER) NUMBERS
Scoring over 100 points in a given week is a good way to earn your team a victory. Through Week 5, the triple-digit mark had been eclipsed 10 times, with all 10 of those teams securing a victory. This week, four more teams accomplished this, but unfortunately sprouts did so in a losing effort, falling to Vandelay Industries 122-110.
The historic win percentage of scoring over 100 points is 88.1% for Sacred Sundays. Going back to 2007, 100 or more has been scored 236 times, with only 28 of those being on the losing end of a matchup. This season is ahead of that, with a 92.9% win percentage. And as mentioned earlier, sprouts 110 points ranks as the 7th most points scored in a loss…
GOD LOVES THREE-POINTERS
In a recent interview, NBA star Jeremy Lin talked about how he didn’t cash in nearly as much as he could have during the “Linsanity” craze that took off while he was with the New York Knicks. He explained, “We’ve turned away almost everything, just because I do think my purpose is to play basketball, play well, and play for the glory of God.” God does love Himself some 3-balls! Hallelujah!
THE BALLAD OF THE UNDRAFTEDS
Struggles continue for the Undrafteds this week as neither one of their quarterbacks scored a point. Here is this week’s lineup:
Jake Locker Ten 0
Justin Forsett Bal 11
Isaiah Crowell Cle 11
Allen Hurns Jax 1
Steve Smith Sr. Bal 17
Dwayne Allen Ind 4
Matt Bryant Atl 11
Philadelphia Phi 21
Total - 76
The average score in the league was 85.8, so this is another loss, dropping them to 1-5 on the year.
BEST BENCH
It really wasn’t even a close one this week. The winner of the Best Bench this week pretty much guessed wrong up and down their line-up, with five (yes FIVE!) roster changes. That team is…Joe’s Pats!! Yessir, Joe could’ve improved his line-up by 52 by swapping T.Y. Hilton for E. Sanders (+28 pts), J. Cameron for A. Gates (+8), A. Jeffery for J. Jones (+7), B. Pierce for S. Ridley (+7) and M. Ryan for R. Wilson (+2). Joe’s 52-point improvement is the highest recorded this season…so far.
Time to get ready for Week 7! Only one week away from mid-terms!!
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