Speaking of the playoffs, in Week 5 I made my predictions for which teams were going to make it in. At that time, I predicted Channel 4 News Team, American BadAss, sprouts, Midnight Maulers, Butkus’ Dick and Vandelay Industries. So I went 5 for 6, with my only miss being that Sofa King Good made it in instead of Vandelay Industries. Next season, I should have all the bugs worked out and will accurately predict all six playoff teams by Week 5. You heard it here.
Now before we go any further, the big congratulations this week go to Joe’s Pats, who racked up 133 points this week which ties two other teams this season for the 3rd highest single-week point total. The most points scored in a single week this season was 140 in Week 6 by Channel 4 News Team. Joe got there by having a massive game from Alshon Jeffery (39 pts), solid work from Tom Brady (23 pts) and Gronk (18 pts), and a surprising near shut-out from the Miami defense who scored 19 pts. Well done Joe! Joe’s Pats becomes the 7th different team to take home a Weekly High Score Prize this season. Remember that all teams, including those that did not make it in to the playoffs, are still eligible to win the Weekly High Score Prizes for these last three weeks of the season.
Okay, let’s get to this!!
YOU KNOW YOU WANT IT
-Eric Decker, WR – Coors Light Drunk Guys – 44 pts – Wide receiver domination continues this season, led this week by Decker. This is now the highest score ever from a wide receiver in Sacred Sundays history, breaking Andre Johnson’s record of only 4 weeks ago! Decker had an absolutely astonishing game, racking up 174 yards and 4, yes 4!!! touchdowns. Now that is just good! (Side note – Decker’s production this week accounted for half of the Coors Light Drunk Guys points. Not bad for a wide receiver…)
-Josh Gordon, WR – Sofa King Good – 41 pts – Gordon had the Jacksonville defense figured out as he went crazy for 261 yards and 2 TD’s.
-Alshon Jeffery, WR – Joe’s Pats – 39 pts – Three wide receivers as the top three point scorers this week?! It’s a passing league these days! Jeffery nearly matched Gordon’s total with 249 yards and 2 touchdowns.
-Peyton Manning, QB – sprouts – 35 pts – Manning scores 35 points and he’s the fourth highest scoring player that week? Things are weird this season. But Manning continued his domination of the fantasy world by throwing for 403 yards and 5 TD’s. He also had 2 interceptions which hurt his total this week. But owing to the lackluster performance by Drew Brees this week, Manning is now the highest scorer in fantasy by 53 points (318 total points, with Brees second at 265).
-Russell Wilson, QB – Butkus’ Dick – 28 pts – What a performance for a second-year QB on Monday Night Football. Wilson passed for 310 yards, 3 TD’s, 0 interceptions, and rushed for 47 yards while the Seahawks stomped the Saints. He has compiled 213 points on the year, which is good enough for 6th overall.
COME ON MAN!
-Antonio Gates, TE – Vandelay Industries – 2 pts – Gates had 41 yards for the game, but lost a fumble costing him two points. All told, this has not been his season, as he has only found the endzone three times all year.
-Martellus Bennett, TE – Butkus’ Dick – 1 pt – Only could muster 2 catches for 14 yards.
-Jordy Nelson, WR – Channel 4 News Team – 1 pt – Only could muster 2 catches for 14 yards. Didn’t I just say that?
-Garrett Hartley, K – sprouts – 1 pt – The Saints were seriously outmatched in Seattle and so Hartley only saw the field three times… two kickoffs and one extra point.
-Jermaine Gresham, TE – Coors Light Drunk Guys – 0 pts – Four times this season, Gresham has gone without scoring a point and hasn’t scored more than 8 in a single week. This is the epitome of “Come on man!”.
JENS, YOU ARE ON THE CLOCKWith the regular season now concluded, we know how the bottom four teams rank for the season:
7 – Joe’s Pats
8 – Vandelay Industries
9 – Coors Light Drunk Guys
10 – BoomGoesTheDynamite
Going from 1st place to 10th place has never happened in Sacred Sundays history, but cheer up Jensy, you’ve got the first pick for 2014! What do you know!?!?
ESOTERIC JOKE OF THE WEEK
How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb? None, it’s a hardware problem.
2013 REGULAR SEASON HIGHLIGHTS
Here are some stats from this year’s regular season:
Highest Single Player Weekly Score – 49 – Peyton Manning, Week 1
Highest Team Weekly Score – 140 – Channel 4 News Team, Week 6
Highest Overall Scoring Week – Week 1 – 991 total points scoredLargest Margin of Victory – 96 – Week 6 – Channel 4 News Team defeated BoomGoesTheDynamite 140-44
Number of times teams have scored over 100 points – 27
Number of times teams have scored over 100 points in a loss – 3
Highest Scoring Team – Channel 4 News Team – 1,304 pts
Most Scored Upon Team – Butkus’ Dick – 1,196 pts against
Most Waiver Moves – 25 – Joe’s Pats
Highest Best Bench – sprouts – 56 pts, Week 3
Lowest Best Bench – 20 – Sofa King Good, Week 8
Most Best Bench Awards – 3 – American BadAss, Weeks 2, 9 and 11
BEST BENCH
Going into this week only two teams have not been the recipient of the Best Bench Award for the week, the Coors Light Drunk Guys and Vandelay Industries. That number has dwindled to only one, as this week’s Best Bench goes to… Vandelay Industries!! Louis could have improved his point total by 29 points this week with three roster moves: S. Jackson for D. Woodhead (+17), R. White for TY Hilton (+10) and D. Amendola for W. Welker (+2). Pretty good run to go for 12 weeks without snagging one of these awards.
The battle for the championship has begun!! Get your rosters ready for Week 1 of the playoffs!!
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