Week 7 - The Return of the (Sofa)King

The scoring slide continues.  Since the record-setting Week 2 scores this season, we have seen a decrease in scoring every single week.  In Week 2, there was a total of 1,034 points scored (with 6 teams scoring >100), last week there were only 812 scored, and now this week there were only a total of 804.  Maybe this point decline is a result of all the injuries we’ve been seeing this season, or maybe it’s the result of owners leaving 30- and 40-point scoring players on their benches?!  Come on, man!  More on that in the Best Bench section…

Week 6 was dominated by Vandelay Industries, who were the only team able to score in triple digits finishing with a monstrous 123-43 over my Longshanks boys.  Rob got a huge performance from Derrick Henry (41 pts) as well as Lamar Jackson (27 pts), and also had strong games from the Miami defense (19 pts) and George Kittle (16 pts).  This was Rob’s first Weekly High Score this season, and the 80-point margin of victory goes down as the 8th largest margin of victory in Sacred Sundays history.  Nice work senor!

This week was almost a mirror image of last week, with only one team able to score over 100 points, and that team absolutely destroying their opponent.  This time it was Sofa King American laying the smack down on American BadAss, 121-37, which ties for the 5th largest margin of victory all time (84 pts)!  James had solid performances all around with all but one player recording double digits, led by Davante Adams-WR (34 pts) and Deshaun Watson-QB (23 pts).  This is James’ first Weekly High Score Prize this season, and marks the 5th different team to win a prize so far.  Nice work MAJOR!!

BIG TIME

• Tyler Lockett, WR – American BadAss – 41 pts – Amazing day from Lockett, catching 15 passes for 200 yards and 3 TD’s!  This is the best single week performance we have seen from a wide receiver this season, and puts Lockett in a tie with Calvin Ridley for highest scoring WR so far.
• Tom Brady, QB – Longshanks – 39 pts – For anyone doubting the power of TB12, this was his 2nd game this season scoring >35 points, he is currently the 5th highest scoring player in all fantasy, and he has his team sitting at 5-2 on top of the NFC South.  Impressive.
• Kyler Murray, QB – sprouts – 39 pts – Here is your current top dog in fantasy!  Kyler has amassed 195 points on the season thus far, with his lowest score being a 20 in Week 3, and now this week scoring in the 30’s for the second time.  He’s 19 points ahead of 2nd place Russell Wilson.  (In 2019, the highest scoring player through 7 weeks (Lamar Jackson) had scored just 171 points.)
• Davante Adams, WR – Sofa King American – 34 pts – When he’s healthy, he is putting up big numbers as he did this week with 16 catches for 196 yards and 2 TD’s.

COME ON MAN

• Jerick McKinnon, RB – Young Guns – 0 pts – The Niners “rested” McKinnon and only gave him 3 carries, which he didn’t do much with.
• Jonnu Smith, TE – Young Guns – 0 pts – The dreaded 1 catch for 9 yards day.
• CeeDee Lamb, WR – American BadAss – 0 pts – Nary a catch to be had for Mr. Lamb.
• Cam Newton, QB – Joe’s Pats – -2 pts – Just 98 yards and 3 interceptions leading to him being benched.  Belichick swears Newton is “absolutely” the starter.  Right, Bill… we’ll see.

BAD FANTASIES

There have been a lot of terrible fantasy performances over the years, and Cam Newton’s this week was certainly up there with the stinkers.  Getting -2 points, as Cam did this weekend, is shameful but it's not nearly the worst score I've ever seen.  To get there you’ve got to go even lower, throw a few more interceptions, and get all the way down to -8!  And amazingly, it has happened twice..two dudes have managed a single week score of -8. The first was John Skelton (QB, ARI) back in Week 14, 2012 and more recently Nathan Peterman (QB, BUF) did it in Week 11, 2017.  In both cases, both quarterbacks threw for less than 100 yards (74 and 66, respectively) and both had a total of 5 turnovers!  Skelton had 4 interceptions and 1 fumble, while Peterman simply threw 5 picks.

But hey, even a legend can have a stinker of a game… look no further than Peyton Manning in Week 10, 2015, where he finished a game with only 35 yards passing and 4 interceptions for a total of -7. 

JOKE OF THE WEEK

I was going to tell a COVID joke here, but there is a 99.696% chance you won’t get it.

ALL UNWANTEDS

2020 has not been kind thus far to those who shalln’t be drafted, as they came into Week 7 at 1-5 and on a 5 game losing streak.  But things were clicking for them this week, in a roster comprised half & half of Jaguars and Football Players:

Look at that!  Five players in double digits, and a final score of 110.  This is their highest score of the season, and was well above the league average (80.4), so the All Unwanteds improve their record to 2-5.

 TOP 5 SUMMARIES

Quick breakdown of the top 5 players at each position, and their scores by week:

• Attack of Mahomes leads the way with 7 players represented above.  (Timmy is dominating with two Kickers in the top 5 AND two Defenses in the Top 5.)
• sprouts has six players above, with a player in every category except Kicker.
• Joe's Pats, Young Guns and Longshanks each have four players represented.
• Vandelay Industries has two players represented.
•  The two American teams (American BadAss and Sofa King American) each only have a single player represented above.
• This year’s “What Do You Know? Bowl” (coming up in Week 9!) is not looking to be a star-studded event, as neither team (Coors Light Drunk Guys and Big Sack No TD’s) has any players represented above.

 

NFL FANTASY SCORES BY TEAM

Through 7 weeks of play, the team which has produced the most total fantasy points is the Tampa Bay Buccaneers.  The Bucs have scored a total of 670 fantasy points this season.   Across every position (QB, RB, WR, TE, K, D), the Buccaneers rank in the top 10 for total fantasy points produced.  Their two highest spots are Defense (2^nd most points) and Tight End (4^th most points).  The rest of the top five highest scoring teams are:  KC (667 pts), ARI (653 pts), SEA (646 pts) and ATL (619 pts).

The lowest scoring team is the New York Jets, who have only totaled 340, barely half of Tampa’s total.  They rank 30^th or 31^st in four categories (QB, RB, TE and K).  The two ‘All Unwanteds’ teams (WSH & JAX) currently rank 28^th and 22^nd, respectively in total fantasy points scored.

Probably the most surprising team is the New England Patriots who currently rank 31^st in fantasy points scored.  They appear to really be missing Brady-Gronkowski, as they currently rank 26^th in quarterback production and dead last in tight end point production.  Get this: Patriot tight ends have scored a total of 4 points this season.  Four points!  In seven games!! 

 

BEST BENCH(ES)

Double dose of Best Benches to dole out this week, and we will start with last week’s.  Last week’s Best Bench was very unique because it only involved 1 player.  A single swap, if you will.  I searched back through my records and did not find another Single Swap Best Bench until way back in Week 9 of 2011!  And because shit is better when it is crazy than not, it was the EXACT SAME TEAM who got it last time as this time!  So, with his second Single Swap Best Bench in the last 9 years, the Week 6 Best Bench goes to… sprouts!  Russ needed to only swap J. Jefferson for D. Parker to get a 30-point improvement last week.  This is the first Best Bench for sprouts this season.  (In case you are wondering, back in 2011 Russ claimed the Single Swap Best Bench with a W. McGahee for L. Blount swap to get a 24-point improvement.)  

Now, as mentioned at the beginning of this post it’s hard to avoid getting a Best Bench when you have a player on your bench score in the 40’s.  Chances become even greater when the active players on your roster for the same position both post zero points.  This is the situation experienced by the Week 7 Best Bench winner, where not one but four roster moves could have improved the final score by a very solid 58 points!  Without further adieu, and claiming his 2nd Best Bench this season, the Week 7 Best Bench goes to… American BadAss!  Jason got nothing from his active receivers this week (OBJ=IR, CeeDee Lamb=terrible), but had Tyler Lockett post 41 on his bench.  The other moves were:  R. Gronkowski for J. Graham (+9), D. Samuel for O. Beckham (+6) and D. Carr for J. Goff (+2).

 

Hard to believe we are nearing the halfway point of the season and it is already time for midterms!!  Get to studying… grades will be posted next week!

Sprouts is back on top!

 Second place is the first loser.  Wow, I mean in a seriously unprecedented occurrence, for a third week in a row, the 2nd highest scoring team lost to the highest scoring team in the weekly matchups.  This week’s victim was Joe’s Pats who posted a respectable 104 points only to lose to the Week 5 high score of 109 points from sprouts!  Russ had all but one of his players score in double digits, led by Kyler Murray-QB (29 pts), Deandre Hopkins-WR (19 pts) and Will Lutz-K (15 pts).  This is Russ’ third Weekly High Score Prize this season, and keeps him alive as the only undefeated team in the league.  Excellent work sir!

In other league action, the North Division continues to lead in terms of total wins (14-11), while the South Division leads in total points scored (2,369 to 2,326).  Remember that the top two teams in each division automatically qualify for the playoffs plus two wild card teams qualify.  See below for my 2020 Playoff Predictions.

Also, I just want to point out – Yahoo has been sending updates regarding all the COVID rescheduling and how point adjustments will be calculated and when waivers will be processed.  Whatever decisions they make on these issues are basically out of my control, so please pay attention to the alerts and follow what they say.  

Along with Playoff Predictions this week, we hand out a 62.5% Best Bench as the winning team this week needed to swap 5 of 8 players!  Lets go!

BIG TIME

• Chase Claypool, WR – Free Agent – 35 pts – Allow me to introduce you to this week’s hottest waiver wire pickup.  In case you didn’t hear about this guy, he had 4 TD’s (3 receiving, 1 rushing) to go along with 110 yards.  
• Ryan Fitzpatrick, QB – Free Agent – 30 pts – The power of the beard!  The Dolphins came out and stunned the 49ers, with Fitzy going off for 350 yards and 3 TD’s!
• Kyler Murray, QB – sprouts – 29 pts – 380 passing yards, 1 passing and 1 rushing TD.  Murray is becoming a real fantasy asset, currently the 5th highest scoring QB.
• Baltimore, DEF – Joe’s Pats – 28 pts – The Ravens just walloped the Bengals, as they registered 7 sacks, 2 fumble recoveries, 1 interception, 1 defensive TD and a 4th down stop, all while only surrendering 3 points.  This ties the single week highest score for a defense this season (IND scored 28 in Week 3).  

COME ON MAN

• Hayden Hurst, TE – Big Sack – 0 pts – Two catches for 8 yards was all Mr. Hurst had to offer this week.
• Dalton Schultz, TE – American BadAss – 0 pts – One catch for 6 yards.  Weak.
• Zach Ertz, TE – Coors Light Drunk Guys – 0 pts – What the hell is going on with tight ends this week?  Geez another 1 catch, 6 yard performance.
• Kansas City, DEF – Attack of Mahomes – -1 pts – The KC defense snagged 1 INT and got a sack, but they gave up 40 points to the Raiders.  The freakin’ Raiders!!
• San Francisco, DEF – Sofa King American – -2 pts – They gave up 43 points to the Dolphins, and all they did to offset it was register 2 sacks.  This is the worst score for a defense this season.  Plus this is the first week where there were multiple negative scoring defenses.

JOKE OF THE WEEK

Why don't blind people eat fish?  Because it's sea food.

PLAYOFF PREDICTIONS

It is time once again to break out the crystal ball and do some prognosticating.  The factors which went into these playoff predictions are: overall record, total points scored, utilization and schedule difficulty. Among any of these categories the highest probability to qualify for the playoffs is within the ‘points scored’ category.  The highest scoring team through 5 weeks has qualified for the playoffs 100% of the time and the 2nd highest scoring team has qualified 92.3% of the time.  (Not super surprising as scoring a lot of points helps you get into the playoffs.)  

From a wins and losses perspective, an undefeated record of 5-0 has a qualification percentage of 83%.  (Five of six teams who started 5-0 qualified for the playoffs.  And the one team to start 5-0 and not qualify was way back in 2007.)  Meanwhile teams at 3-2 and 2-3 qualify at 69% and 61% respectively.  And unfortunately for winless teams, an 0-5 start has never been overcome to make the playoffs.  Six teams have started off 0-5, and not one of them has made the playoffs.  Can Big Sack become the exception to the rule?!  What do you know?!  

Taking all categories into consideration here are the 2020 Sacred Sundays Week 5 Playoff Predictions:

• sprouts – Sprouts lead the way in points scored and overall record, plus are tops in bench utilization and have the easiest schedule going forward.  Russ has had great production from Kyler Murray at QB, and Alvin Kamara and Aaron Jones at running back.  
• Longshanks – A 4-1 record has qualified for the playoffs 75% of the time, and the 2nd highest scoring team has qualified 92.3% of the time.  I also currently rank 2nd in bench utilization and have the 3rd easiest schedule remaining.
• Joe’s Pats – The Pats have scored the 3rd most thru the first five weeks, which has a 71.4% playoff qualification rate, and their record, 3-2, has qualified 69% of the time. Joe also ranks 4th in bench utilization and has the 2nd easiest schedule remaining.
• Sofa King American – The King currently ranks 7th in points scored which, interestingly, has historical playoff qualification rate of 60%.  James also ranks 5th in bench utilization and 5th in schedule difficulty.
• Young Guns – Currently rank as the 5th highest scoring team, which has qualified for the playoffs 80% of the time historically.  John’s record of 3-2 qualifies at 69%, but he does has the 2nd hardest schedule remaining.

The final spot was a tough one to pick.  Vandelay Industries has a good record (3-2), but is 9th in scoring and have the hardest schedule remaining.  American BadAss is currently 4th in scoring, but have a hole to climb out of with a 1-4 record.  The Coors Light Drunk Guys have two wins so far (2-3), but rank 8th in scoring.  Big Sack, having yet to register a victory this season, is a long shot to make it in.  Thus, my final prediction for the 2020 playoffs is:

• Attack of Mahomes – The record of 2-3 qualifies for the playoffs 61% of the time, and Timmy ties with James for having the 5th easiest schedule from here on out.  In terms of total points scored AOM ranks 6th, which is concerning because the 6th ranked team after 5 weeks only qualifies for the playoffs 38.5% of the time.  But I’ve got confidence in the big play ability of Mahomes, so I think Timmy will make it in!

In only 8 short weeks we will know how accurate these predictions were.  The last two seasons I’ve been correct on 5 of 6 teams.

BEST BENCH

Big Sack made a strong push this week to claim a 3rd Best Bench, but his 37-point improvement possibility was not enough to top this week’s winner.  With more than a 50% roster swap, and a solid 44-point improvement possibility (2nd highest this season), the Week 5 Best Bench goes to…. American BadAss!  Jason needed to swap 5(!) players to get there:  J. Goff for D. Prescott (+13), H. Ruggs III for O. Beckham Jr. (+12), C. Lamb for T. Lockett (+8), Indianapolis for Seattle (+6) and R. Gronkowski for D. Schultz (+5).  BadAss is now the fifth team to snag a Best Bench this season.

Already closing in on Week 6!  No Thursday Night game this week, and teams on byes are the Seahawks, Chargers, Saints and Raiders.

Longshanks throws out the competition in Week 4!

 

Matchups have been brutal this season!  Again we see a team score over 100 points yet lose.  This has happened 5 times this season (out of 16 occurrences), so 100+ scores are winning at just 68.8% this season.  On top of that, the last two weeks have seen the 2nd highest scoring team lose to the highest scoring team…brutal!

On the delivering end of the brutal defeat this week were my Longshanks boys who had 4 players score in double digits, led by my new favorite player, Green Bay Packer tight end Robert Tonyan who finished with 27 points thanks to 98 receiving yards and 3 TD catches on Monday night!  Also scoring in the twenties were Dalvin Cook (26 pts), Russell Wilson (23 pts) and DJ Chark (21 pts).  It all added up to 144 points and a 29-point victory over American BadAss, the aforementioned second highest scoring team.  Perhaps it is fantasy karma as BadAss was tops last week, beating the 2nd highest scoring team, Big Sack.  Weirdly enough, my Week 5 opponent is Big Sack, so if this trend holds Jens should be the highest scoring team in Week 5 and I’ll finish 2nd.

In league standings, sprouts still remains as the sole undefeated team at 4-0 and Big Sack is still the only team yet to win.  At 4-0 sprouts has a 71.4% likelihood to make the playoffs and a victory this week increases the likelihood to 80%.  For Big Sack, an 0-4 start only has a 12.5% likelihood to make the playoffs, but a victory this week (1-4) increases the likelihood to 40%.  An 0-5 start, however would not be good, as that has never resulted in a playoff berth in Sacred Sundays history.  Tune in next week for the full annual Playoff Predictions!  

Just a few items to get to this week including a Best Bench that is the biggest one since Week 14, 2018.  Let’s go!

BIG TIME

• Dak Prescott, QB – American Bad Ass – 40 pts – Dak’s arm is going to fall off soon!  He has thrown for over 450 yards in each of the last 3 weeks, the most for any quarterback over a 3 week span in NFL history!  This week he threw for over 500 yards (502!!), 4 TD’s and 1 interception.  He is the current top scoring player in fantasy, with 128 total points and two games of 40+.
• Joe Mixon, RB – Big Sack – 39 pts – Mixon’s production this week more than doubled what he had done in the first three weeks of the season combined!  He came into the week having scored only 17 points total, but then went wild for 151 yards and 2 TD’s on the ground, plus 30 yards and another TD receiving.
• Tom Brady, QB – Longshanks – 35 pts – Brady threw 5 TD passes to 5 different players.  Brady is showing he can still get it done, as he is the 7th ranked QB and has even scored more points than Lamar Jackson so far.
• Odell Beckham Jr, WR – American BadAss – 33 pts – This was the kind of day you expect from OBJ… 5 catches for 81 yards and 2 TD’s, plus a 50-yard rushing TD on an end around!  Nice!
• Aaron Rodgers, QB – Coors Light Drunk Guys – 29 pts – Superb night for Rodgers throwing for 327 yards and 4 TD’s!  On the season he has thrown 13 TD’s with zero interceptions. 
• Robert Tonyan, TE – Longshanks – 27 pts – How about this for a waiver pickup?  The undrafted Mr. Tonyan caught all six passes thrown his way for 98 yards plus 3 TD’s!  In spite of not scoring any points in Week 1 (he might not have even played), he is currently the top scoring tight end in fantasy with 46 points (T. Kelce is in 2nd place with 41).
• George Kittle, TE – Vandelay Industries – 27 pts – Look at the tight ends this week!  Scoring all these points.  Get this, Kittle was targeted 15 times and he caught every. god. damn. one. of. them.  15-for-15!  That is the way you are supposed to do it!  He finished with a Tony Gonzales-esque stat line of 183 yards and a TD.

COME ON MAN!

• Greg Zuerlein, K – Big Sack – 2 pts – In spite of Dallas scoring 38 pts, ‘The Leg’ only attempted and made 2 extra points.  WTF?
• Robbie Gould, K – Vandelay Industries – 2 pts – Only 2 PAT’s for Gould as well… kickers…what can you do?
• Michael Gallup, WR – Sofa King American – 2 pts – His quarterback throws for 502 yards, but he only manages 29 of those?  That’s weak.
• Arizona, DEF – sprouts – 1 pt – Since the start of the year, here are the Cards' Defense weekly scores: 11, 9, 5, 1.  Based on that trend, they should be scoring -3 or -4 in Week 5.  It’s a sinking ship Russ!  Jump!
• Marvin Jones, WR – Coors Light Drunk Guys – 0 pts – Jones got the whole nine yards in this game.  Literally, 9 yards.  That's all he got. Nine.
• Calvin Ridley, WR – Joe’s Pats – 0 pts – In spite of not catching a pass this week, Ridley is the leading wide receiver in fantasy.  You get that?  Through the first 3 weeks he has scored 58 points, and the second highest scoring wide receiver, DK Metcalf, has now scored 55 points through four weeks of the season.  So maybe he just took this week off to let everyone else catch up...

JOKE OF THE WEEK

It took the United States three months to get COVID, but not China.  China got it right off the bat.

ALL UNWANTEDS

Much better showing for the UnWanteds, as Gardner Minshew and Antonio Gibson had solid games.  Roster composition was back to 6 Jags and 2 Football Players:

QB	Gardner Minshew II	Jax	23
WR	Laviska Shenault Jr.	Jax	8
WR	Keelan Cole	Jax	4
RB	Antonio Gibson	WF	18
RB	James Robinson	Jax	10
TE	Tyler Eifert	Jax	2
DEF	Washington	WF	4
K	Aldrick Rosas	Jax	15
		Total	84

The average league score this week was 89.6, so this goes down as another loss, moving them to 1-3 on the season.  

FANTASY SCORES BY NFL TEAM

Summing together all points scored by NFL teams shows some interesting things.  First off, the NFC has a lot of high scoring teams, (currently owning the top 3, 4 of the top 6, and 6 of the top 10), except for in the NFC East.  Three of the bottom five teams come from the NFC East, with Philadelphia, Washington and the New York Giants all finding themselves at the bottom of the list.

Rank	Team	Points
1	GB	454
2	Sea	445
3	Dal	420
4	Buf	396
5	KC	388
6	TB	377
7	Bal	354
8	Atl	353
9	SF	350
10	Cle	345
28	Phi	269
29	Ten	264
30	Was	256
31	NYJ	206
32	NYG	196

Other notes – 

• Dallas is ranked 3rd, in spite of their defense ranking last with only 6 points scored so far.
• New England is clearly missing Gronk, as the Patriots have only 3 points from the tight end position this season.
• San Francisco has scored the 9th most points overall, yet have the 2nd fewest points from the wide receiver position, with only 31 total points coming from that position this season.
• Tampa Bay is a surprise in the top 10, but they have gotten a boost from their defense who currently ranks 3rd in points scored, and their wide receivers rank 5th overall.

BEST BENCH

Sometimes you’ve done something once, and you just know you can do better, like maybe even twice as good.  That’s what our Best Bench winner did this week, with a doubly good performance for Week 4, and a whopping 60-point improvement possibility!!  Without further adieu, for the second time this season the Best Bench goes to… Big Sack!!  Jens needed to make just three roster swaps to get this big change:  J. Mixon for A. Ekeler (+38), A. Gibson for N. Chubb (+14) and C. Wentz for M. Ryan (+8).  

As mentioned this was the highest Best Bench since American BadAss had a 66-point one in Week 14, 2018, and ties for the 3rd highest in the last 4 seasons.  And also as mentioned, this Best Bench is “doubly” good because not only did Jens double his Best Bench from Week 1 (30 pts to 60 pts), but he also would have more than doubled his score with his bench improvements this week, going from 59 to 119!  What do you know?!?

We’ve made it through the first quarter of the season with only one COVID postponement.  Let’s see how far we can get before the wheels completely come off!  Let's do this!!

'Merica!!

 Sometimes the Weekly High Scoring team comes out of the gates like a rocket blasting to a huge lead and never looks back.  Other times it’s a team who looks dead early on but has a resurgence to take over.  The latter was clearly the case this week as American BadAss started off by being down 64 points, yet came back to win 122-112 over Big Sack and took the high score in the process!  Jason had huge games from Dak Prescott (29 pts), Tyler Lockett (28 pts) and the Indianapolis Colts Defense (28 pts).  (That defensive performance is the best single week we have seen from a defense this season).  The win gets BadAss a first victory of the season and moves them into a 3-way tie for 2nd place at 1-2 in the South Division.  Nice work bro!

Three weeks in and we are down to just one undefeated team (sprouts – Russ) and one winless team (Big Sack – Jens).  Big Sack would have had a victory this week against any other team, as 112 was the 2nd highest score of the week.  Tough matchup and outcome…historically speaking, scoring over 100 pts has led to victory 88% of the time.  But this season there have been 14 scores over 100, with already 4 of them ending in a loss, as we also saw Young Guns lose this week with 100 points.  Sprouts has the best record and leads all teams in scoring by a 50-point margin (375 total), plus they have scored over 100 points every week so far!  The Sacred Sundays records for undefeated and winless starts both stand at 6 (i.e. 6-0 and 0-6), so we are halfway there.  

Not a whole lot to get to this week, so let’s do this!!

BIG TIME

• Patrick Mahomes, QB – Attack of Mahomes – 42 pts – It’s hard to find new superlatives and adjectives to describe what Mahomes is able to do.  He was splendid on Monday night, stupefying defenses, while throwing an inconceivable 31-of-42 for 385 yards and 4 TD’s, plus rushing for 26 yards and another graceful TD!  The guy is an absolute marvel.  
• Russell Wilson, QB – Longshanks – 36 pts – Another 30+ point performance from Wilson.  He got into a slugfest with the Cowboys, ultimately throwing for 315 yards and 5 TDs!  Through three games he has thrown 14 touchdowns which is the most in NFL history.  Keep it up Russ!
• Alvin Kamara, RB – sprouts – 30 pts – Kamara did his damage mostly by receiving, as he caught 13 passes for 139 yards!  He also added 58 rushing yards.  Kamara is the lead scoring runningback in fantasy, currently averaging 25 points per week.
• Josh Allen, QB – Young Guns – 30 pts – Yet another quarterback this week with 5 total TD’s.  Allen rushed for 1 TD, but also threw for 311 yards and 4 TD’s!  (He did also have one interception).  This is his second game in a row with >= 30 points.
• Dak Prescott, QB – American BadAss – 29 pts – Dak attempted 57 passes (!), a career high, completing 37 for 472 yards (!) and 3 TD’s.  Two interceptions marred what was otherwise an awesome day.
• Stephen Gostkowski, K – Free Agent – 25 pts – He’s kicking for Tennessee now (weird), but had an amazing day with 6 field goals… 3-for-3 from 30-39 and 3-for-3 from 50+, and 1 extra point.

COME ON MAN

• Josh Kelley, RB – Longshanks – 2 pts – Only 43 yards and a lost fumble… that’s just not good.
• Mark Andrews, TE – sprouts – 2 pts – This is the second week in a row Andrews has laid a deuce.
• Darren Waller, TE – Joe’s Pats – 0 pts – Solid performance from last week sure didn’t carry over to this week, as he caught just 2 passes for 9 yards.  Ouch.
• New Orleans, DEF – Vandelay Industries – 0 pts – The Saints D didn’t do much to disrupt the Packers as their only stat was a single, solitary sack while also giving up 37 points.

TOP 5’s CHECK IN

Through three weeks here is a breakdown of the top five by position:

Notes: 

-Every team has at least one player represented above.

-sprouts has the most players represented (5), followed by American BadAss and Attack of Mahomes who each have 4.  

-Free agents only show up in kickers (of course).  Seriously, if anyone would have drafted a guy named “Rodrigo Blankenship” I would have thought you were making shit up.  I’m still not convinced a) that is his real name, or b) it’s even a real person.

-Vandelay Industries has a real love affair with tight ends.  On top of the two TE’s currently ranked in the top 5, Vandelay’s current starting tight end is George Kittle.  (Although Kittle currently ranks as the 47th tight end in fantasy).  Didn’t Mike Holmgren once say “You can never have too many tight ends”, or something?  Rob abides.

THOSE WHO SHALLN’T BE DRAFTED

This was the worst week so far for the All Unwanteds.  The lone bright spot was another strong game from James Robinson, but other than that it was pretty brutal…

The average league score was 97.8, so this is a big loss for the UnW’s, dropping their record to 1-2.

BEST BENCH

Three weeks of the season and we’ve already got our fourth Best Bench winner.  With the best Best Bench of season so far this season, Week Three’s award goes to… Attack of Mahomes!  Timmy could have improved his point total by 31 with three roster moves:  J. Robinson for M. Gordon +21, T. Boyd for D. Moore +6 and Baltimore for Kansas City +4.

This is Tim’s first Best Bench since Week 2 of last season.  Every team in the league, except one, has had at least one Best Bench in the last 20 weeks--going back to Week 16, 2018.  But the team holding the current record for longest streak without a Best Bench has not held the dubious distinction since Week 8, 2015!!  We have a nearly five year record in the works!  To preserve the mystery and avoid placing a jinx on this team, I’ll refrain from naming them at this time.  (If the current record holder’s streak extends to 5 years (i.e. they make it past Week 8 with no Best Benches), I’ll divulge the team… for now it remains a secret.)

Week 4 is already upon us!  Two weeks away from the annual Playoff Predictions!

Double it up for sprouts!!

It was the week of the quarterbacks.  Eight of the top ten scorers this week were quarterbacks, four of the top five were QB’s, and five quarterbacks scored over 30 points with nary one of them named ‘Mahomes’.  Surprisingly, the top QB through the first two weeks of the season is Josh Allen.  Not bad for a 15th round keeper for Young Guns!  Allen posted 27 points in Week 1 and 36 this week, giving him 63 points and a 1 point overall lead over 2nd place Russell Wilson.  But even the old guys are scoring a lot… Matt Ryan currently ranked 6th with 54 points and Aaron Rodgers sitting at 7th with 51 points.

In other interesting news, Week 2-2020 goes down as the highest scoring week ever in Sacred Sundays history.  Thanks to six teams scoring over 100 points (which ties a record), the total points scored were 1,034 beating the previous record of 1,002 set back in Week 6-2018.  This marks only the third occasion where the total points for a single week crossed 1,000.  To put this in perspective, the lowest scoring week of all-time was Week 10-2015, where across all 10 teams only 689 points were scored.  The high score for that week was only 85 points, which would have only defeated two teams this week! 

Before we go any further, big congrats to Russ for destroying the competition for a second week in a row and taking home another Weekly High Score Prize!  Sprouts showed last week was no fluke, as they bested last week’s total by 20 points, finishing with 145 points and a 42 point victory!  Russ had a three-headed monster posting massive points with Aaron Jones, Alvin Kamara and Kyler Murray combining for 102 points!  (43, 28 and 31 respectively).  The victory puts sprouts at 2-0 and makes them one of only two undefeated teams remaining (Joe’s Pats is the other).  Excellent work Russ!

Just a couple things to report on this week, most notably a Best Bench of the sort we haven’t seen in five years… Onward!

NOW THAT’S THE INSIDE STUFF

• Aaron Jones, RB – sprouts – 43 pts – Forty-point performances are an exceptional feat that don’t happen very frequently, but this is Jones’ 2^nd time to do it as he had 41 points last year in Week 5.  He got there this time by having 236 total yards from scrimmage and 3 TD’s.
• Dak Prescott, QB – American BadAss – 42 pts – Dak with some huge numbers and killing it on the rush yards/rush TD ratio.  Check it out, on the day he had 450 passing yards and just 1 TD, but then added 18 rushing yards and 3(!) rushing TD’s.  Three TD’s with only 18 yards…sounds like Jerome Bettis’ stats in his final season when they would only put him in if they were on the two yard line.
• Jared Allen, QB – Young Guns – 36 pts – Your aforementioned leading fantasy point scorer two weeks in.  He’s already passed for 729 yards, 6 TD’s and 0 interceptions.
• Cam Newton, QB – Joe’s Pats – 36 pts – Newton had another outstanding game for New England, and is returning to his old form with getting into the endzone on the ground.  He led the Patriots in rushing with 47 yards and 2 TD’s, plus added 397 passing yards and 1 TD.   
• Russell Wilson, QB – Longshanks – 32 pts – Wilson scored his points in a bit more conventional fashion for a quarterback… 288 yards passing and 5 TDs!  He did also add 39 rushing yards.
• Kyler Murray, QB – sprouts – 31 pts – Murray had a good day passing (286 yards, 1 TD, 1 Int), but made this a special day by adding 67 yards and 2 TD’s on the ground.

 

COME ON MAN!

• Julio Jones, WR – Coors Light Drunk Guys – 2 pts – Julio had a great start to the season last week, where he was targeted 12 times and had 18 pts, but this week he was only targeted 4 times catching two of those for just 24 yards.
• T.Y. Hilton, WR – Vandelay Industries – 2 pts – Tyrone’s Youngin’ caught just two passes and dropped what should have been a 44-yard touchdown.  D’oh!
• Cincinnati, DEF – Longshanks – 1 pt – I take full blame for playing the Bengals in the first place, but in my defense they were going up against the Cleveland Browns who had given up the most points to defenses (22!) in Week 1.  But somehow, again even though they were playing the Browns, Cincinnati's D gave up 35 points and managed just 1 interception.  They didn’t even sack Baker Mayfield.  That guy runs like a bag of potatoes and they couldn’t even catch him.  I hate the Bengals.

JOKE OF THE WEEK

I’ve asked so many people what LBGTQ stands for, and so far I haven’t gotten a straight answer.

ALL UNWANTEDS

The All Unwanteds were heavy on the Jaguars again this week, with the roster consisting of 6 Jaguars and 2, um, Football Players. 

QB	Gardner Minshew II	Jax	22
WR	Keelan Cole	Jax	11
WR	Laviska Shenault Jr.	Jax	6
RB	James Robinson	Jax	17
RB	Antonio Gibson	Was	11
TE	Tyler Eifert	Jax	9
DEF	Washington Football Team	Was	5
K	Josh Lambo	Jax	5
		Total	86

The average score for the league was 104, so this goes down as a loss moving their record to 1-1.

‘TOO SOON’ DRAFT ANALYSIS

Two weeks in is a bit soon to start drawing any conclusions, but here are some early season notes on draft picks:

Players you should’ve picked when you had the chance: 

• Aaron Jones, RB – sprouts – 56 pts – 9^th pick, 2^nd round (13^th selection excl. keepers)
• Russell Wilson, QB – Longshanks – 62 pts – 10^th pick, 3^rd round (23^rd selection excl. keepers)
• Calvin Ridley, WR – Joe’s Pats – 47 pts – 10^th pick, 4^th round (31^st selection excl. keepers)
• Cam Newton, QB – Joe’s Pats – 61 pts – 1^st pick, 7^th round (48^th selection excl. keepers)

Players you wish you hadn’t:

• Michael Thomas, WR – Vandelay Industries – 1 pt – 5^th pick, 1^st round (4^th selection, excl. keepers)
• George Kittle, TE – Vandelay Industries – 4 pts – 10^th pick, 2^nd round (10^th selection, excl. keepers)
• Kenny Golladay, WR – Joe’s Pats – 0 pts – 1^st pick, 3^rd round (15^th selection, excl. keepers)
• A.J. Brown, WR – Young Guns – 3 pts – 8^th pick, 4^th round (29^th selection, excl. keepers)
• Le’Veon Bell, RB – Longshanks – 4 pts – 1^st pick, 6^th round (39^th selection, excl. keepers)
• Rob Gronkowski, TE – American BadAss – 1 pt – 9^th pick, 7^th round (56^th selection, excl. keepers)

Draft grades will factor in on midterms…still plenty of time for things to change.

BEST BENCH

As mentioned earlier, the Best Bench this week is like one we haven’t seen in five years, and one which has only occurred four times prior to this week.  For Week 2, 2020 I have the distinct honor of awarding not one, but TWO Best Benches this week!!  Two teams were able to make two roster swaps to improve their totals by 25 points… the double-honorees are:  Joe’s Pats and Young Guns!

Joe needed to swap L. Fournette for C. Edwards-Helaire (+17) and S. Diggs for M. Evans (+8).  John needed to swap R. Mostert for S. Barkley (+14) and J. Brown for A. Thielen (+11).  (In the annual tallies for total Best Benches, this goes down as a half Best Bench for each of you.)

With the rash of injuries we saw in Week 2, I’m sure the Yahoo! servers are going to be set on fire with all the waiver claims this week.  Make sure to get ‘em in, get your roster set, and get ready for Week 3!!

Week 1 Has Sprouted!!

 And we’re off!  Bit of an odd week with no fans and all the safety protocols in place, but at the end of the day it was still football!!  So good to see…

Due to the way Week 1 matchups shook out, four of the top five scoring teams played each other.  That meant my Longshanks boys lost despite scoring 112 points (3rd highest) to Joe’s Pats (122 pts - 2nd highest) and Sofa King American lost despite scoring 96 points (5th highest) to the Week 1 High Scorer: sprouts!  Russ had a solid all-around performance with 7 of his 8 players scoring in double digits, led by Kyler Murray-QB (26 pts) and three players with 18: DeAndre Hopkins-WR, Juju Smith-Schuster-WR and Alvin Kamara-RB.  It all added up to 125 points, and was nearly an optimal victory as he only had a 3-point bench improvement possibility.  Nice work Russ!

Just a quick one this week to kick off the season… we’ll see how the All Unwanteds performed in Week 1, take a look at what Week 1 results mean, and of course, award the first Best Bench of the season.  Onward!

BIG TIME

-Aaron Rodgers, QB – Coors Light Drunk Guys – 33 pts – Look at Rodgers making everyone say “Why in the f*#% didn’t I draft Rodgers?!”  The dude discount-double-checked the Vikings for 364 yards and 4 TD’s!  

-Josh Jacobs, RB – Joe’s Pats – 31 pts – That’s a good way to start your season… 93 yards and 3 TD’s.

-Davante Adams, WR – Sofa King American – Adams was targeted 17(!) times and caught 14 passes, on his way to 156 yards and 2 TDs. 

-Russell Wilson, QB – Longshanks – 30 pts – Big day for Russ as he completed 31 of 35 passes for 322 yards, 4 TD’s and 0 INTs.

COME ON MAN!

-Rob Gronkowski, TE – American BadAss – 1 pt – Gronk caught just 2 of 3 passes thrown his way for only 11 yards.  The Brady-Gronk magic has not returned yet.

-Mecole Hardman, WR – Attack of Mahomes – 0 pt – The love for Kansas City Chiefs runs so deep with Timmy, he started their 4th string wide receiver.  That is some deep devotion there.  But hey with Mahomes throwing the ball, anything is possible...unfortunately this week it amounted to just 1 catch for 6 yards.

-Evan Engram, TE – Young Guns – 0 pts – Not for lack of trying… Engram was targeted 7 times, caught 2 of the passes, but only gained 6 yards.  Yuck.

ALL UNWANTEDS

Solid showing to start the season for those who shalln’t be drafted (except Terry McLaurin and DJ Chark).  Jacksonville surprisingly had a decent fantasy showing in Week 1, and Peyton Barber from the team that shalln’t be named had a solid performance as well:

The league’s average score this week was a 94.6, so this goes down as a victory for the Unwanteds! 1-0

DOES WEEK 1 MATTER?

My official annual playoff predictions don’t come out until after Week 5, but I wanted to take a look at Week 1 outcomes and if they seemed to have any effect on playoff teams or final finishes.  For data, I only went back five seasons, so through 2015.  Across all five years, winning or losing in Week 1 didn’t have any impact on playoff qualification.  Teams winning in Week 1 qualified 60% of the time, which is right in line with how many teams make it in to the playoffs.

Looking at points scored in Week 1 versus final standings did show a negative correlation, suggesting higher scoring teams ultimately finish better in the standings.  For playoff qualification, higher scoring teams have qualified at higher rates.  Teams scoring over 95 points in Week 1 have qualified for the playoffs 75% of the time, and teams scoring over 120 have qualified 100% of the time.  (Albeit that has only happened twice.)  Teams scoring 75 points or better have qualified 66% of the time, which is pretty much the same as the percent of teams who qualify.  And so do you know what this mean?  It means that what happens in Week 1 really doesn’t matter at all…come on, its only Week 1!

BEST BENCH

Just because your team scores a lot of points doesn’t make you immune from earning the Best Bench in any given week.  In fact since 2010, there have been 10 instances where the Weekly High Score Winner also nabs the Best Bench, and we frequently see high scoring teams end up here as well.  Not the case this week.  Nope, look down at the bottom of this week’s scoreboard and you’ll find Week 1’s Best Bench… Big Sack!  What do YOU know?!  Jens could have improved by 30 points with 3 roster moves:  M. Brown for J. Mixon +18, S. Watkins for C. Godwin +7 and M. Brown for A. Robinson II +3.  (Seriously Jens, how do you have 2 players named “M. Brown”?  You need to fix that.  Hahaha!)

The waiver wire has already been lighting on fire, so I don’t need to remind you guys to get your waivers in.  Let’s go Week 2!!