Coors Light Drunk Guys are CHAMPS!

The Coors Light Drunk Guys are the 2011 Sacred Sundays Champions! In yet another big game, the Drunk Guys took advantage of the prolific New Orleans Saints’ offense and scored 106 points to best Joe’s Pats by 17, 106-89. Congratulations Shawn! That is neat! The victory this weekend capped an amazing run by the Drunk Guys, that included 10 victories, no losses and one tie game. The last loss they recorded was in Week 4 against American BadAss. During that 11-game run the closest two games were the tie game (against American BadAss) in Week 15, and a 1-point victory (over the Midnight Maulers) in Week 11. Other than that, the Drunk Guys essentially ran over the competition. They led the league in scoring for the regular season with 1,316 points, and if you include the playoffs, they scored 1,651 points this year which is an impressive 103 points-per-week average!! F. N. A. KERR’S LIGHT!!!

Also, for the second week in a row the Lords of Lumberg outscored everyone to take home the Weekly High Score Prize! Way to go Timmy!! Timmy had not won a high score prize for the first 14 weeks, and decided to go ahead and double up to end the year. Matthew Stafford and Arian Foster led the way for the Lords (scoring 29 and 25 points, respectively), giving Tim a final tally of 108 points. Better late than never!

In the other significant game this week, Jagger ran out of moves and lost to American BadAss by the score of 85-77. That put Jens in fourth place for the season and Jason in third place. The Lords of Lumberg (Timmy) finished in fifth place by beating SOFA KING GOOD (James) last week, who finished sixth. My Scottish Rebels topped Frito Pie (Rachel) to finish seventh, placing Frito Pie in eighth, and sprouts (Russ) defeated the Midnight Maulers (Jamie) to finish in ninth place, leaving the Maulers in tenth. Remember that the draft order will be the reverse of standings from this year, so Jamie, you are on the clock!

So for this the final weekly wrap-up of the season we do a final count on the prize money won, take a look at final player stats, hand out final grades and find out which team takes the final award for Best Bench. But first, as always, some observations…

BOOYAH!

Aaron Rodgers, QB – American BadAss – 32 pts – Just a run-of-the-mill day for Rodgers with 283 yards, 5 touchdowns and no interceptions. Seriously, can anyone stop this guy?

Cam Newton, QB – Scottish Rebels – 30 pts – Newton had four total touchdowns (3 passing, 1 rushing) and 236 yards of total offense. That gives him 14 rushing touchdowns on the season which is more than any runningback, except for LeSean McCoy.

Matthew Stafford, QB – Lords of Lumberg – 29 pts – Stafford only missed on 7 of his 36 passes on Sunday, finishing with 373 yards and three touchdowns. He finishes the season ranked 5th out of all players with 307 points scored. Not bad for a guy taken with the 95th pick in our draft.

Tom Brady, QB – Joe’s Pats – 29 pts – Rather fitting that in the final week of the season, the top four performers for the week are four of the five top performers for the year. Brady was the fourth highest scoring player this year (behind only Rodgers, Brees and Newton), finishing with 344 points (which was 34 points ahead of Stafford).

COME ON MAN!

Jason Witten, TE – Scottish Rebels – 2 pts – The Cowboys appeared to be sleepwalking through this game with the Eagles, content to lie down and prepare for the Giants in Week 17. Witten only managed two catches for 24 yards.

Steve Smith, WR – Joe’s Pats – 2 pts – Carolina scored a whopping 48 points against the Bucs, yet Steve Smith only had 1 reception for 9 yards and 1 rush for 23 yards. WTF?

Dan Bailey, K – Scottish Rebels – 1 pt – Let’s be perfectly honest…the Eagles should have shut out the Cowboys. The last second touchdown by the Cowboys was unbelievably lucky. The fact that that was the only time they were even in scoring position does not instill a lot of confidence for next week’s game.

Cedric Benson, RB – American BadAss – 1 pt – Benson carried the ball 16 times for 57 yards, but lost TWO fumbles in the process. That means he fumbled the ball 13% of the times that he touched it. Ouch.

Chicago, DEF – Midnight Maulers – 0 pts – Here’s the new rule of thumb… if your defense is playing against the Green Bay Packers, it is probably wise to pick a different defense.

FINAL PLAYER STATS

Here are some interesting stats I noted while looking at the final player stats:

• Rob Gronkowski scored more points as a Tight End (214) than all but one Wide Receiver, Calvin Johnson (227).
• David Akers scored 29 more points than the next closest kicker, Dan Bailey, 175 to 146.
• The average score across the top 282 players was 118.1. Aaron Rodgers more than tripled that total with 394 points scored.
• Five quarterbacks scored more than 300 points this season, while only four runningbacks scored more than 200 points.

So which positions scored the most points? Quarterbacks and (surprisingly) defenses. Here is the breakdown:

The Top 100 players this season (when combining together all offensive positions, kickers and defenses) was comprised of 30 Defenses, 23 Quarterbacks, 20 Runningbacks, 15 Wide Receivers, 10 Kickers and only 2 Tight Ends. (The only two defenses that did not rank in the top 100 were Tampa Bay and Indianapolis).

The Top 50 players this season was comprised of 18 Quarterbacks, 15 Defenses, 9 Runningbacks, 5 Wide Receivers, 2 Tight Ends and 1 Kicker.

The Top 25 players this season was comprised of 12 Quarterbacks, 6 Defenses, 4 Runningbacks, 2 Wide Receivers, 1 Tight End and no kickers.

The Top 10 players this season was comprised of 8 Quarterbacks and 2 Runningbacks.

So which teams ended up with the most top players this year? Not surprisingly, our league champion had the most of the Top 50, Top 25 and Top 10. Here is a breakdown of that:

Top 100: Free Agents 23, Joe's Pats 11, CL Drunk Guys 9, Frito Pie 8, Lords of Lumberg 8, Moves like Jagger 8, Scottish Rebels 8, Midnight Maulers 7, sprouts 7, American BadAss 5, SOFA KING GOOD 6.

Top 50: CL Drunk Guys 7, Joe's Pats 6, Free Agents 6, Moves like Jagger 5, American BadAss 4, Lords of Lumberg 4, Scottish Rebels 4, SOFA KING GOOD 4, sprouts 4, Frito Pie 3, Midnight Maulers 3.

Top 25: CL Drunk Guys 4, Lords of Lumberg 3, Moves like Jagger 3, American BadAss 2, Joe's Pats 2, Midnight Maulers 2, Scottish Rebels 2, SOFA KING GOOD 2, sprouts 2, Free Agents 2, Frito Pie 1.

Top 10: CL Drunk Guys 2, Joe's Pats 2, Lords of Lumberg 2, American BadAss 1, Midnight Maulers 1, Moves like Jagger 1, Scottish Rebels 1, Frito Pie 0, SOFA KING GOOD 0, sprouts 0.

FINAL SCORING STATS

All season I have been keeping track of the number of times teams scored 100 points or more in order to see how often that leads to victory. In total, the triple-digit barrier was eclipsed 43 times this year. Figuring five games a week for 16 weeks, that means that 26.9% of the scores were greater than 100. Of the 43 times observed, only 7 of those were in a losing effort. So by scoring more than 100, teams registered a victory 83.3% of the time. From an historic perspective (going back to 2007), scoring over 100 points leads to victory 88.9% of the time.

In case you were curious, the team with the most 100+ games was the Coors Light Drunk Guys who did it 9 times, and the team with the least was sprouts, who only did it once (in Week 13 in a loss to the Drunks). Weeks 4 and 13 had the most teams score over 100, with five teams achieving the mark. One more stat on scoring? The team that had the most losses while scoring over 100 points, well that would be my Scottish Rebels who only scored over 100 four times, and lost on two of those occasions.

KEEPERS FOR 2012

The same keeper rules will apply for 2012. Refer back to the Week 12 post for complete rules. The gist is that each owner can designate up to two players from this year’s final roster as keepers for next year. For any player designated a keeper, that player will count as a draft pick in the same round as drafted in 2011. Any keeper from 2011 will count as a first round pick and any player acquired as a free agent will count as a 15^th round pick.

I’ll send out a spreadsheet with all of the final rosters in the next couple days. Keepers will need be declared a week after the conclusion of the NFL draft, which is typically around the end of April.

SOY ALERGICO A LOS CACAHUATES

Rachel and I received a bag of “Chili HOT Peanuts” as a gift this holiday, and it had quite the warning label. After listing the ingredients as: Peanuts, Sunflower Oil, and Spices, it stated, “This product may contain trace amounts of peanuts and/or other tree nuts.” So be careful if you are buying a bag of peanuts, because there might be trace amounts of peanuts in there.

EVERYBODY NEEDS MONEY; THAT’S WHY THEY CALL IT MONEY

Here is the final tally on prize money won this season:

1. Coors Light Drunk Guys - $220 – Championship plus three Weekly High Score prizes
2. Moves Like Jagger - $160 – Four Weekly High Score prizes
3. SOFA KING GOOD - $120 – Three Weekly High Score prizes
4. Joe’s Pats - $90 – Runner-up plus one Weekly High Score prize
5. Lords of Lumberg - $80 – Two Weekly High Score prizes
6. American BadAss - $40 – One Weekly High Score prize
7. Scottish Rebels - $40 - One Weekly High Score prize
8. Midnight Maulers - $40 - One Weekly High Score prize

Frito Pie and sprouts finished out of the money this season.

FINAL GRADES ARE POSTED

Coors Light Drunk Guys – A+ -Led the league in scoring, victories and longest win streak, all with only 3 waiver moves. Impressive.

Joe’s Pats – A -Solid season with the #4 QB (Tom Brady) and #1 RB (LeSean McCoy).

American BadAss – A -A tie game against the eventual champion in the playoffs was tough.

Lords of Lumberg – A- -Had Timmy been able to beat American BadAss in his wildcard game, he would have been the league champ, as he claimed the High Score Prize in the weeks when it matters most.

Moves Like Jagger – B -It’s not how you start; it’s how you finish.

SOFA KING GOOD – B -James had the unfortunate distinction of being the team that had the most points scored against him this year.

Frito Pie – B- -Rachel had bad luck before the season began with Peyton Manning’s season ending before even starting.

Scottish Rebels – C+ -A poor draft and a record-setting losing streak to start the year made my shot at a repeat title virtually non-existent.

sprouts – C -A big bright spot for sprouts was drafting Rob Gronkowski in the 13^th round. I smell keeper!

Midnight Maulers – C- -Jamie’s magic touch on receivers never seemed to happen this season, as Boldin struggled and Jennings never really took off.

BEST BENCH

The final award for Best Bench goes to one of the teams with a lot on the line this week, competing for the league championship. With a 35-point improvement possibility, the 16^th and final Best Bench award goes to… Joe’s Pats! Joe would have needed to make these three roster moves: J. Nelson for S. Smith (+21), J. Stewart for L. McCoy (+11) and M. Bush for R. Mathews (+3).

As usual the season has come and gone in a blink of an eye. Seems like only last week I was laughing at Shawn’s draft choices, and wondering how he expected to win with so many Saints on his team. Wait, that was last week. Haha!! What do you know?!?! In all seriousness, being in this league is awesome and really makes the football season that much better. Next season will mark the 9^th Anniversary of the creation of this league, and will also mark the 5^th year with the same group of owners. That to me is remarkable, and I just want to say thank you to all of you for making this league great year-in and year-out. I’m looking forward to many more fun-filled years!

Happy 2012!!!

And then there were two...

It’s the most wonderful time of the year! There’s Santa Claus, presents, Trans Siberian Orchestra, eggnog… but most importantly, the Sacred Sundays Championship game! Everything has led up to this point, where we now have two teams that have never won the title set to square off for the big money and all the bragging rights. In the first semi-final game, Joe’s Pats continued to have strong performances from Tom Brady and LeSean McCoy, while Moves Like Jagger stumbled to their 2nd worst point total of the season. In the other semi-final game American BadAss, with a kicker and a defense playing on Monday night, needed 30 points to pass the Coors Light Drunk Guys, and got 29. That caused the game to finish tied at 90 points each (coincidentally the first tie game of this season), with the tie-breaker going to the Drunk Guys by virtue of being the higher seeded team. (More below on playoff tiebreakers.) So the 2011 Championship will be decided between Joe’s Pats and the Coors Light Drunk Guys! Congratulations Joe and Shawn!

Big congratulations need to go out this week as well to the Lords of Lumberg, who really cranked it up and scored 113 points to take the Weekly High Score Prize! This in spite of the fact of having Percy Harvin lay a big fat egg and tally zero points. But that was easily offset by giant games from Matthew Stafford scoring 32 points and Reggie Bush (yeah, remember this guy?) scoring 27 points. Nice job Timmy!! By winning the High Score Prize this week, that marks the eighth different team that has been the high scorer this year.

Only one more week to go! Just a quick update…

TIEBREAKERS

Here are the tie-breakers that will be used should there be a tie in the Championship game:

1) Team with the highest scoring quarterback wins

2) Team with the highest scoring runningback wins

3) Team with the highest scoring wide receiver wins

4) If still tied at that point, co-Champions will be declared

The tie-breaker rule used for any playoff game prior to the Championship game, is that the higher-seeded team is declared the winner. This rule differs from the tie-breakers used by Yahoo!. The Yahoo! tie-breakers look first at the head-to-head record, then go to the higher seeded team. In our system head-to-head records are used in determining final divisional standings, but I don’t think that should be a factor in playoff games. Basically, I figure that the higher seeded team in the playoffs can be considered the “home” team, and therefore should have a slight advantage. Also, higher seeded teams have done better throughout the regular season, so I believe that there should be a reward for that.

All that said, I am open to modifying our tie-breaker rules for next season to sync up with the Yahoo! tiebreaker rules. After the conclusion of the season, when I send out the final rosters, I’ll ask for everyone to vote on which tie-breakers to use.

BEST BENCH(ES)

Week 14 did not have many points left on the bench. In the end, the winner of Best Bench for the week was Moves Like Jagger! Jens could have bettered his total by 25 points with two roster moves – A. Brown for M. Wallace (+17 pts) and A. Hernandez for J. Finley (+8 pts).

In Week 15, Moves Like Jagger tried to make it a repeat performance by leaving 31 points on his bench, but that could not top the bench from American BadAss! Jason could have improved his point total by 35 points with three roster changes – B. Celek for J. Gresham (+23 pts), T. Smith for B. Lloyd (+9 pts) and M. Austin for L. Robinson (+3 pts).

Next week I will pass out all end of year grades, and we crown a brand new Sacred Sundays Champion!!!

Merry Christmas everyone!!!

IT'S PLAYOFF TIME!!!

Going into last week, four of the six playoff teams were known for sure, while two spots were still up for grabs. The Lords of Lumberg won their game to get six wins on the season, which secured the second wildcard spot. Three teams finished tied at 5-8 in the South Division that led to a four-level tiebreaker to determine the division runner-up. Here’s how it broke down – Level 1 - SOFA KING GOOD, sprouts and Frito Pie all had overall records of 5-8. Level 2 – All had divisional records of 3-4. Level 3 - In head-to-head matchups, SOFA KING GOOD had the advantage over Frito Pie, Frito Pie had the advantage over sprouts, and sprouts had the advantage over SOFA KING GOOD. Level 4 – Points scored: SOFA KING GOOD-1208, Frito Pie-1067, sprouts-990. So by virtue of scoring more points, SOFA KING GOOD is in! But in an odd twist, because of the overall record, SOFA KING enters the playoffs as the 6th seed—behind both wildcard teams! Crazy!

But the big congratulations this week go to Mr. F’n’A himself—Shawn Martin and his Coors Light Drunk Guys!! This week’s victory marked Shawn’s 9th straight win, and by scoring 122 points, he took home his second Weekly High Score Prize of the season! The Drunk Guys lead all teams in scoring with 1,316 points and thus enter the playoffs as the top seed. And Shawn has done this essentially with the team he drafted, having only made 3 waiver claims all year. (Two of his three claims involved first dropping Marshawn Lynch then re-adding him a week later…so really it’s more like only two claims made.) That is quite an impressive feat, as my current team barely resembles the team I drafted (only 5 players that I drafted are still on my team. Lol!) Well done Shawn!! F! N! A!!!

So now that the playoff teams are known, we’ll take a look to see how close I was with my early-season playoff predictions. Also, we’ll see if the worst player in all of fantasy can pull himself out of the cellar and we will find out which team claimed a league-leading fourth Best Bench Award of the season! But first, some observations...

HARD-NOSED FOOTBALL

Cam Newton, QB – Scottish Rebels – 37 pts – In twelve games, Newton has rushed for 13 touchdowns, which is already the most ever by a quarterback in a season. This also marks the third time this year that he has scored over 30 points. He’s good.

Aaron Rodgers, QB – American BadAss – 34 pts – Rodgers continues to dominate the world of fantasy football, and the world of real football for that matter. He has not scored less than 20 points in any week, and now leads all players by a wide margin in total points for the season. He has 323 points so far which is 37 points ahead of second-place Drew Brees.

Percy Harvin, WR – Lords of Lumberg – 31 pts – Harvin has shown promise the last two weeks (scoring 15 and 18 points), but really broke out this week with a 156 yards receiving and two touchdowns along with 19 yards rushing. Who says you can’t have a good receiver with Christian Ponder as your QB?

Ray Rice, RB – Moves Like Jagger – 30 pts – The Browns defense offered little-to-no resistance for Ray Rice, as he gouged them for 204 yards and a touchdown.

Pierre Garcon, WR – sprouts – 30 pts – In spite of the season that the Colts are having, Garcon is actually having a fairly decent season. He is currently on pace to have his first 1,000 yard season, and ranks 14th among wide receivers in points scored this year. (Which is higher than Dwayne Bowe, Brandon Marshall and Anquan Boldin). This week, he added 150 yards and two touchdowns.

Chris Johnson, RB – SOFA KING GOOD – 30 pts – Johnson apparently decided to sleep through the first 8 games of the year. Through those 8 games, he averaged a pedestrian 7.13 points per game. In his last four, he is averaging 18.75. Yeah, I’ll take the second one.

POWDER PUFF

Oakland, DEF – Scottish Rebels – 1 pt – Oakland was averaging 18.67 points per game over their previous three games coming in to this week, and were playing against the Miami Dolphins. Should have been a dream match-up. Instead, they surrendered 28 points, got no turnovers and only were able to sack Matt Moore one time. One freaking time. Yuck.

LeGarrette Blount, RB – sprouts – 1 pt – Blount averaged 1.7 yards per carry on his 11 attempts Sunday, finishing with barely 19 yards. Now there are reports that he is in trouble with the law. Fitting… he should get arrested after a pathetic performance like that.

PLAYOFFS?

After Weeks 3 – 6 this season, I made predictions on which teams would make the playoffs based on previous year’s standings. In Week 3, I was only correct with 50% of my predictions. In Weeks 4 & 5, I was correct with four of the six entrants. In Week 6, I was correct with 5 of the 6 eventual playoff participants. In that Week, I predicted that Moves Like Jagger, Joe’s Pats, American BadAss, Lords of Lumberg, Coors Light Drunk Guys and Frito Pie would make the playoffs. Not bad… I’ll hone my methods over the off-season and see if I can’t nail the prediction by Week 4 next year!

A TIE GAME IS KINDA LIKE KISSING YOUR SISTER

Remarkably, for the first time since 2007 we finished the regular season with no tie games. Here is a reminder of how any tie games will be settled in the playoffs:

Ties in any playoff game prior to the Championship Game will automatically go to the higher seeded team.

If there is a tie in the Championship Game, the following tiebreakers will be used:

1) Team with the highest scoring quarterback wins

2) Team with the highest scoring runningback wins

3) Team with the highest scoring wide receiver wins

4) If still tied at that point, co-Champions will be declared.

And don’t think that these won’t come into play… last year sprouts and my Rebels tied 87-87 in the championship game, and I won because Vick outscored Schaub. Also remember that throughout the playoffs (Weeks 14 – 16), Weekly High Score Prizes will still be awarded with all teams being eligible to win.

WORST PLAYER IN FANTASY

Going in to Week 13, Josh Johnson held the title for Worst Player In All Of Fantasy, owing to the fact that he had minus (-)2 points total for the year. But fortune smiled on him this week as Tampa’s starting QB Josh Freeman was out with an injury. So Josh Johnson took to the field as the starter and threw for 229 yards and a touchdown, and rushed for 45 yards. He did toss one interception as well, but finished the day with 15 points! Way to go Josh! And I have newfound respect for him after reading this Yahoo! report: “Johnson separated his left (non-throwing) shoulder Sunday against Carolina, but was able to pop it back in place and finish the game.” Hell yeah! Any player that finishes a game after separating their shoulder is all right in my book.

Josh Johnson, you are no longer the Worst Player In All Of Fantasy. That title now belongs to Mike Kafka…

NORTHERN DOMINATION

The North Division was the powerhouse this year, besting the South Division in points scored (5,925 to 5,621), games won (37 to 28), playoff entrants (4 to 2), and in inter-divisional head-to-head victories (19-11).

PICKING THE WINNERS

Only two teams made their selections in the Weekly Matchups, and ironically, it was two teams that would be at or near the top of waiver priority anyway. In the end, my Scottish Rebels bested Jamie’s Midnight Maulers by picking correctly in three of the games.

BEST BENCH

The winner of this week’s Best Bench is becoming a familiar name in this section. This marks the fourth time this season that this team has won this award, and the second time in the last two weeks. (Not since Joe’s Pats did it in Week’s 14 and 15 of 2010 has a team taken home the award for Best Bench two weeks in a row!) If you remember the winner from last week, then you already know that this week’s winner for Best Bench is… sprouts!! This week Russ could have improved his point total by 44, with three roster moves: P. Garcon for A. Johnson (+21), R. Mendenhall for L. Blount (+17) and N. Novak for S. Janikowski (+6). And not to point to fine a point on it, but had Russ made these roster changes, he would have tied the record for the highest point total of all-time, currently held by SOFA KING GOOD from Week 3 of this year, 148.

There is another Thursday night game this week, so make sure you have your roster set by then. Best of luck to the playoff teams!!

It's good to be the King!

The King is back! James nearly doubled his point total from last week, and thanks to big games from Victor Cruz, Chris Johnson and the Baltimore Defense, claims his third Weekly High Score Prize of the season!! Nice job, Cap’n!!

In other games, Moves Like Jagger posted his lowest total of the season in a loss to my Scottish Rebels, while the Coors Light Drunk Guys won in convincing fashion, which moved Shawn into the top spot in the league. Jagger had been the lead dog since Week 5, but the Drunk Guys have now won 8 straight games! Do it to it, Shawn!

With only one week left of the regular season, everyone is probably thinking playoffs… and for good reason. Four of the six playoff spots are set, and five teams are still in the running for the remaining two spots. See below for the full playoff breakdown. Also this week, we start looking ahead to 2012 keepers and I make two weeks in a row with some political ranting! Fun stuff!!

But first, as always, some observations…

SUPERHEROS

Drew Brees, QB – Coors Light Drunk Guys – 39 pts – Brees was unstoppable against the Giants on Monday night, and totaled 5 touchdowns (4 passing, 1 rushing) to go along with 363 yards passing. He has now thrown a touchdown pass in 38 consecutive games. That is how you do that!

Tom Brady, QB – Joe’s Pats – 31 pts – Brady was in his usual dominant form as the Patriots walloped the Eagles on Sunday. He got 361 yards passing along with 3 TD’s and no interceptions. On the season he now has 3,627 yards, which is only 62 yards behind the league leader, Dan Marino… er, I mean Drew Brees. Also, Brady has now thrown a touchdown pass in 27 consecutive games.

Victor Cruz, WR – SOFA KING GOOD – 30 pts – Cruz caught a career-high 9 passes for 157 yards, and got in the endzone twice against the Saints on Monday. In the last two weeks, he now has 285 yards and three touchdowns.

Beanie Wells, RB – Frito Pie – 29 pts – Beanie had the best rushing day ever for a Cardinal, tallying 228 yards (including a 71 yard burst) and a touchdown.

BIG FAT ZEROES

Andre Johnson, WR – sprouts – 2 pts – Considering that Johnson was coming off a hamstring injury and has a rookie quarterback, his total could have been worse. Not by much, but it could have been worse.

Vincent Jackson, WR – Scottish Rebels – 2 pts – Did I not predict this last week?! Jackson’s nickname should be “Rollercoaster”, because of how his season is going. This season in Weeks 2, 4, 9 and 11 he has scored 32, 16, 32 and 25 points respectively. In the weeks following those games (3, 5, 10 and 12) his points have totaled 6, 3, 2 and 2. Hey Vinny, how about just two weeks in a row with 12 points? That would be nice…

Jordy Nelson, WR – Joe’s Pats – 2 pts – I guess being white this week was a detriment for Nelson, as he only snagged 4 catches for 26 yards.

Mike Wallace, WR – Moves Like Jagger – 1 pt – After the blistering start to the year, Wallace has cooled down considerably. He has only one 100-yard game in his last eight outings, and has not caught a touchdown pass in his last three games. Against KC on Sunday, he only got 2 catches for 17 yards.

Jason Hanson, K – Lords of Lumberg – 1 pt – The Lions look like the Lions again, and Green Bay showed why they are undefeated.

Robert Meacham, WR – Coors Light Drunk Guys – 0 pts – It is amazing that you can have a quarterback score 39 points on the week, yet one of his starting wide receivers goes without a single catch. Weird…

KEEPERS FOR 2012

As we are nearing the end of the 2011 Sacred Sundays season, it is time to start thinking about keepers for next year. The same rules regarding keepers last year are in effect. Here is a refresher on those rules:

- Each owner may designate up to 2 players from their final 2011 roster to keep for their 2012 roster.

- Any player designated as a keeper for 2012 will count as the draft choice for the owner in the same round that the player was drafted in the 2011 draft.

- Any player that is currently designated as a keeper (i.e. a keeper in the 2011 draft) will count as a first round draft choice for 2012. (This is regardless of what round the player was assigned in the 2011 draft. For example, Michael Vick was a keeper in the 15th round for 2011, but will count as a first round pick for 2012.)

- Any player not drafted and acquired through waivers or as a free agent pick-up will count as a 15th round draft pick for 2012.

- Any player that was drafted, but was acquired through waivers or as a free agent pick-up will count as a draft pick in the same round as drafted in 2011.

- Any player acquired through trade will count as a draft pick in the same round as drafted in 2011.

o If the traded-for player was not drafted in 2011, he will count as a 15th round pick.

- If two players are kept that both qualify as a choice in the same round (i.e. two first round picks), one player will be assigned to that round and the other player will be assigned to the following round (i.e. two first round picks will count as a Round 1 pick and a Round 2 pick).

o The exception to this is if the two players being kept both qualify as 15th round picks. In that case, the two players will count as 14th and 15th round picks.

- The Commissioner will settle any disputes on keeper value.

Rosters will be considered final a week or so after the conclusion of our Championship game. I will send out an email with all final rosters. Keeper selections will be due on the Sunday following the NFL draft.

PLAYOFFS!!

With only one-week left of the regular season, the playoff picture still is anything but settled. First the things that we do know – the Coors Light Drunk Guys, Moves Like Jagger and Joe’s Pats all automatically qualify for the playoffs and American BadAss has snagged a wild card, while only the Midnight Maulers have been mathematically eliminated. The remaining five teams all have a shot to get in. Here are possible scenarios for those teams.

sprouts – Runner-up in South Division – Win remaining game, OR lose remaining game PLUS a loss from SOFA KING GOOD.

Wild card – Owing to potential tiebreakers, it does not appear possible for sprouts to qualify for a wild card.

SOFA KING GOOD – Runner-up in South Division – Win remaining game PLUS a loss from sprouts.

Wild card – Win remaining game.

Frito Pie – Wild card – Win remaining game PLUS a win from SOFA KING GOOD and losses by Scottish Rebels, Lords of Lumberg and sprouts.

Scottish Rebels – Wild card – Win remaining game PLUS losses from Lords of Lumberg and sprouts.

Lords of Lumberg – Wild card – Win remaining game PLUS losses from Scottish Rebels and sprouts.

Keep in mind that I’m only looking to find a possible scenario for each of the above situations to occur. Even with only one week left, there are still a multitude of scenarios that can play out. Next week, once all playoff participants are known, I’ll see how accurate my early season playoff predictions were…

POLITICAL RANT

If you haven’t been doing so already, now would be a good time to start stocking up on 100-watt incandescent light bulbs. Beginning in 2012, these light bulbs will no longer be available. They are not going away because they’re no longer useful to consumers or profitable to manufacturers… they’re going away because the federal government is outlawing them. Apparently our fearless leaders prefer mercury-laden compact fluorescent bulbs that are manufactured in China, to standard light bulbs that have been around for generations. How have we gotten to this point?

Politicians are arrogant, egotistical beings who relish the power that they wield. Especially those elected to federal offices. They truly believe that the solution that they think is best is the only solution that will work. Our Founding Fathers were smart enough to realize that they wouldn’t be able to solve every problem. They also realized that getting a large group of people to agree on something is next to impossible. (I’ve been serving as the Chairman for my Neighborhood Committee, and have seen this firsthand. Even on something as simple as a neighborhood picnic, within a group of 12 people, there will be 15 different opinions on how it should operate.) Fortunately, the Founders were able to agree on a short list of enumerated powers for the federal government, but left everything else to the states (an idea codified in the 10th and 14th Amendments). They realized that they would not be able to solve New York’s problems from Washington D.C., so they wanted to leave that up to New York.

But now we are getting to a point where everything in every part of the country has to be handled in the exact same manner… the manner in which the federal government thinks is best. Whether it’s education, transportation, land-use, healthcare, light bulbs, toilets… there are a multitude of aspects of our daily lives that are being mandated from Washington D.C. And if states try to define their own rules, which may run counter to federal rules, the feds step in and shut them down. Free people should be allowed to choose the laws under which they live, and should be governed by those closest to them (geographically, not emotionally). It used to be a cliché to refer to our country as the United State of America, but we are getting to the point where there is less and less distinction between states due to an overpowering federal government. I highly recommend the book “Power Divided is Power Checked” by Jason Lewis. In it the author makes a compelling case for the need to return to a constitutional republic and restore states’ rights. That is how our country was set up and how the Founders intended it to be. I don’t believe the Founders would recognize today the country that they created.

LIKE A DOG ON A FIRE HYDRANT

If you haven’t seen it already, do yourself a favor and Google “Kicker pisses on the sideline”, and watch Nick Novak (K, SD) drain the main vein while a trainer shields him with a towel. Absolutely hilarious! “Hey trainer, why does the Gatorade taste so weird today?”

PICK ‘EM

Only four teams made their picks this week, and my Scottish Rebels came out the winner by getting 3 picks correct! Don’t forget to make your picks if you want to be moved to the top of the waiver order.

JOSH JOHNSON UPDATE

Josh did not get any playing time this last week, so his point total for the season sits at minus (-) 2. Good news though, reports indicate that he took most of the first team reps with the offense on Wednesday! Fingers are crossed!

BESTEST BENCH

It wasn’t even a close one this week. With a five-player roster swap, this week’s Best Bench Award winner could have improved his point total by a solid 54 points! That distinction belongs to….sprouts! Russ would have needed to make the following substitutions: R. Fitzpatrick for P. Rivers (+14), S. Janikowski for N. Novak (+14), S. Johnson for D. Moore (+13), D. Nelson for A. Johnson (+8) and W. McGahee for R. Mendenhall (+5). This is sprouts third Best Bench Award of the season, and the second highest bench total of the season. (The record this season is from Week 1 – Midnight Maulers +64).

Don’t forget… there is another Thursday night game this week, so make sure you have your roster ready to go by then. And check back here next week, where we’ll take a look at the regular season final standings and see how teams rank historically based on win-loss records.

Moves Like Jagger busts out!!

Just when you thought it was safe to leave the house, Jagger went and busted another move! In fact, it was a double Jagger move this week, as Jens took the Weekly High Score Prize and picked the most correct winners in the Weekly Matchups! The Weekly High Score Prize was captured thanks to a “to-be-expected” big game from Ray Rice, and a “where-in-the-hell-did-that-come-from” big game from Nate Washington. Rice has been big all season and added 26 points this week, while Washington, who has only scored in double digits twice this year (and never above 15), racked up a solid 23 points. Nice work Jensy! That makes it four Weekly High Score Prizes on the year.

In other interesting developments this week, the Coors Light Drunk Guys won in spite of playing a player on a bye week (Marques Colston, WR), and sprouts won in spite of playing a player who scored zero points (David Nelson, WR) and a player who scored -1 points (Willis McGahee, RB). Normally things like that lead to a sure defeat, but not this week! On the flip side, American BadAss lost in spite of scoring 100 points. Thus far this season, scoring in the triple digits means victory 82.8% of the time. (Historically speaking, breaking the 100-point barrier has led to victory 89.2% of the time.) So you can net -1 points from two of your players and win, or score 100 points and lose!

We are getting down to the nitty-gritty now with only two weeks left until the start of the playoffs!! Amazingly, the South Division Runner-up spot can still be claimed by three teams (sprouts, SOFA KING GOOD, and Frito Pie), and all but one team in the league are still in the hunt to at least snag a wild card. See below for the full breakdown of playoff scenarios. Also, after taking several weeks off from political ranting, I jump back into it full-bore! Booyah!!

Let’s get to this!...

YOU WANNA DIE WITH A MAN’S GUN...

Kevin Smith, RB – Free Agent – 38 pts – Not bad for a guy who wasn’t even on an NFL team as of 3 weeks ago. We’ll see how long his knees hold out this go ‘round.

Matthew Stafford, QB – Lords of Lumberg – 29 pts – Stafford tossed 5 touchdowns against the Panthers, which tied a Lions’ team record, and set a record for the highest passer rating ever in a game from a Detroit QB with a 121.9 rating.

Ray Rice, RB – Moves Like Jagger – 26 pts – Rice is averaging nearly 20 points per game for his last four, and currently has a career high 10 total touchdowns on the season.

Vincent Jackson, WR – Scottish Rebels – 25 pts – V-Jax continues his roller coaster season with another big outing following a dud. His last four game totals have been: 4, 32, 2, and 25. If only games were two weeks apart he might have 500 points this year.

NOT SOME LITTLE SISSY GUN LIKE THIS…

Chris Johnson, RB – SOFA KING GOOD – 2 pts – Johnson had his worst outing of the season, which is extra troubling because it’s not like he’s been exactly lighting it up this year. He managed to only carry the ball for 13 yards on 12 carries (1.08 yards per carry, lol), and had three catches for 15 yards. So in total, he only gained 1.69 yards for each time he touched the ball.

Wes Welker, WR – Frito Pie – 2 pts – After a scorching start to the season where he averaged 22.6 points per game for his first five games, Welker is only averaging 6.6 points per game over his last five. However, he still ranks 2nd out of all wide receivers.

Deion Branch, WR – Coors Light Drunk Guys – 1 pt – I think Branch’s problem this season is that he’s not a tight end named Gronkowski.

Beanie Wells, RB – Frito Pie – 1 pt – Wells got eight carries for 33 yards and a lost fumble.

Mario Manningham, WR – Scottish Rebels – 0 pts – After averaging 11.3 points per game for the last three weeks, Mario laid an egg on Sunday night against the Eagles. He only managed one catch for a whopping four yards. Go suck your head.

David Nelson, WR – sprouts – 0 pts – Well, at least he wasn’t held without a catch. He did manage to snag one of the four balls thrown his way, but it went for zero yards. Ah I guess he should’ve just dropped that one too…

Willis McGahee, RB – sprouts - -1 pts – McGahee tried to do his best Chris Johnson impression, rushing for only 18 yards on 12 carries (1.5 yards per carry). He topped CJ’s performance though, by losing a fumble and finishing on the wrong side of zero this week.

PLAYOFFS… WHERE WINGS TAKE DREAMS!

Only two more weeks of the regular season until we get to the games that really matter… the PLAYOFFS! Team records have been so closely packed for the last several weeks that trying to figure out playoff scenarios was like trying to install window tinting on the back window of a Nissan pick-up truck. (Just ask Tim – That shit is impossible…) . Finally after this week’s games, some clarity has emerged in the playoff race.

There are four teams whose post-season fates are known… In the North Division, Moves Like Jagger and Joe’s Pats have clinched playoff spots, but are still jockeying to see who will be the division champ. Moves Like Jagger holds a one game lead, so by winning out will claim the Division Championship. In the South Division, the Coors Light Drunk Guys have clinched the Division Championship and thus will have a first round bye in the playoffs! Congratulations Shawn!! F’n’A! Also in the South, the Midnight Maulers have been mathematically eliminated from post-season play. Remember, as in year’s past Weekly High Score Prizes will continue to be awarded throughout the playoffs, with all teams being eligible to win.

For the six remaining teams, all are still alive and have a path to make it to the playoffs. Here are possible scenarios for each team to make it in:

American BadAss – Runner-up in North Division – Win two remaining games PLUS two losses from Joe’s Pats and will come down to points scored.

Wild Card – Win one remaining game.

sprouts – Runner-up in the South Division – Win two remaining games, OR Win one remaining game PLUS one loss from Frito Pie AND one loss from SOFA KING GOOD.

Wild Card – Win one remaining game (but may come down to tie-breakers).

SOFA KING GOOD – Runner-up in South Division – Win two remaining games PLUS two losses by sprouts.

Wild Card – Win two remaining games PLUS two losses by Lords of Lumberg AND one loss by Scottish Rebels.

Frito Pie – Runner-up in South Division – Win two remaining games PLUS two losses by sprouts.

Wild Card – Win two remaining games PLUS two losses by Lords of Lumberg AND one loss by Scottish Rebels.

Lords of Lumberg – Wild Card – Win two remaining games; OR Win one remaining game PLUS one loss from Scottish Rebels AND one loss from SOFA KING GOOD and one loss from Frito Pie.

Scottish Rebels – Wild Card – Win two remaining games PLUS one loss by Frito Pie AND one loss by SOFA KING GOOD.

POLITICAL RANT

There is a growing sentiment out there that started online and has moved into the Occupy Wall St. crowd regarding student loan debt. The gist of this sentiment is that people who have student loan debt should be bailed out (much like the bank bailout) and have their loans forgiven. A petition online suggests that forgiving all of this debt would serve to stimulate the economy. At present, over 655,559 people have signed this petition. I find this petition and the support for it troubling on a number of levels. First off, the idea that giving out free money toindividuals somehow stimulates the economy has never been proven to be true. Do you remember that George W. Bush stimulus in 2008 where everyone received a direct payment of $600? Yeah, kinda didn’t help us in our current situation. The only way to stimulate an economy is through increasing production, and increasing the supply of goods and services. Increasing demand (by giving people more money to spend) only stimulates a person to buy that which has already been produced! This can cause short-term blips of economic improvement but does nothing for the long-term health of an economy. Additionally, increasing demand serves to drive up prices (i.e. inflation) because you have more dollars chasing the same number of goods.

Secondly, this petition makes a giant leap by assuming that the government actually has the authority to just willy-nilly wipe away debts and dissolve mutually agreed contracts. In spite of the ever-expanding power exuded by the government over, well, everything, they still do not possess this authority. Nor should they. These are contracts that were agreed upon by the borrower and the lender. Only in a pure dictatorship would the government have this kind of power, and thankfully we are not yet at that point. Those petitioning the government to assume this authority reminds me of a quote by Thomas Jefferson: “A government big enough to give you everything you want, is big enough to take away everything you have."

Lastly this petition, and the support for it, shows no regard for the morality of paying your debts. It is immoral to borrow money and not pay it back. The fact is that people who took out loans to go to school did so with the full knowledge of how much money they were receiving and knowing that it must be paid back. Also, it is not as if these individuals did not receive anything for the money they paid… they received an education! If they now feel that they did not get their money’s worth, then they need take that up with the educational institution and file a lawsuit if necessary. Or if they wasted their college education on a worthless liberal arts degree, then they need to go down to their local city park and camp out with the other losers. Otherwise, they need to do as millions of students have done before them and pay off their loans.

Wow… I feel so much better now...

L.V.P. (Least Valuable Player)

So just who is the worst player in fantasy football this season? Lots of players have scored zero points on the season, owing to never getting an opportunity to play. But it really takes a special player to have negative points overall after 11 weeks of play. Willis McGahee, who scored in the negative for this week, still has 91 points total for the season.

At this point, there are only three players in the league with negative overall point totals. There is currently a tie for the 2nd Least Valuable Player, with Michael Robinson (RB, SEA) and Mike Kafka (QB, PHI) both with -1 points on the season. The current frontrunner for Least Valuable Player this season is Josh Johnson (QB, TB), who has racked up a grand total of -2 points! He has accomplished this monumental feat by completing 2-of-7 passes for 14 yards, rushing for 11 yards on 4 attempts and also losing a fumble in the process. (His rush yards have come in different games, so he has yet to actually register any positive points in a game). I’ll keep an eye on Josh for the remainder of the season to see if he can dig himself out of the hole…

BEST BENCH

There was not a team within 14 points of the winner of the Best Bench for this week, which goes to none other than yours truly… my Scottish Rebels! I could have improved my point total this week by a solid 32 points with three roster moves: Oakland D for Cincinnati D (+20 pts), D. Jackson for M. Manningham (+9 pts), and J. Starks for S. Jackson (+3 pts).

Don’t forget to have your roster set for Thursday’s games! Happy Thanksgiving to everyone!!!

Joe's Pats on fire for Week 10!

It was a week of blowouts! The NFL had final scores of 44-7, 37-9, 30-3, 37-13 and 45-7, while our league had final scores of 83-56, 128-92 and 115-67. The 115-67 score belonged to the What Do You Know?! Bowl, where the Coors Light Drunk Guys walloped Moves Like Jagger by 48 points! Shawn must really have a thing for big margins of victory, because he holds the record for this season’s largest margin of victory when in Week 6, he defeated Frito Pie by 67 points, 101-34.
F ‘n’ A!!!

But the big congratulations this week go to the team that ran it all the way up to 128 points… Joe’s Pats!! Joe had great performances from his usual suspects, Tom Brady and LeSean McCoy, but was bolted to the top this week courtesy of a tremendous show put on by Michael Bush! This is Joe’s first Weekly High Score Prize this season making him the 5^th different team to win the prize in the last five weeks and the 7^th different team to take home the prize on the season. Well done Joe!!

With Thanksgiving right around the bend, that always means two things: a) that playoffs are not far off and b) the trade deadline is even closer. With that in mind, this week we’ll do a little primer for the playoffs and take a look at all the trades that have happened this season.

But first, the observations…

BIG TIME FOOTBALL

Michael Bush, RB – Joe’s Pats – 32 pts – Three weeks in a row now, Bush has rushed for more than 100 yards. This week he had 157 yards rushing, which when combined with his 85 yards receiving, gave him the most yards by a Raider since they joined the league in 1970! (Bo Jackson held the record previously). It should be interesting to see what the Raiders do with their backfield once McFadden is back off injury next week.

Arian Foster, RB – Lords of Lumberg – 30 pts – Over his last four games, Foster’s scores have been 40, 18, 20 and 30, for an average of 27 points per game. He’s good.

Aaron Rodgers, QB – American BadAss – 28 pts – Rodgers has not scored fewer than 21 points in any week this year. He is averaging 27.33 points per game, and leads all fantasy players this year with 246 points scored. The next closest is Drew Brees, a full 24 points behind.

Larry Fitzgerald, WR – Frito Pie – 26 pts – Fitzgerald was at his finest on Sunday, gaining 146 yards and scoring two touchdowns. He nearly had a third TD, just barely coming up short on a lunge after a remarkable over-the-head catch.

POWDER PUFF

Vincent Jackson, WR – Scottish Rebels – 2 pts – After scoring 32 points last week, Jackson did what he has done all season after a big game and took the following week off. In weeks following Jackson’s three big games this year (with scores of 32, 16 and 32 points), he has scored 6, 3 and 2 points. Yuck.

Darren Sproles, RB – Midnight Maulers – 2 pts – Sproles got stuffed by Atlanta, gaining only 3 yards rushing and 2 yards receiving. His only points came from the fact that he had 102 return yards on the day. Yuck. Yuck.

Dwayne Bowe, WR – Lords of Lumberg – 1 pt – Bowe was only able to manage 2 catches for 17 yards with Matt Cassel at the helm. Not sure if his prospects are improving with Tyler Palko throwing. Triple yuck.

BARTER SYSTEM

The trade deadline is upon us. All trades must be completed by this Friday, November 18th. There have only been four trades so far this year, so this probably won’t really affect any teams.

Speaking of trades, here is a look at this year's trades. Basically, I just took a look at the total points scored by players after they were traded to see which teams came out ahead and which got the shaft. Whether the traded player was on the active roster in a given week was not considered, only the total points scored.

Sept 24 – Joe’s Pats trade Cam Newton (Car, QB) and Mario Manningham (NYG, WR) to Scottish Rebels for Brandon Marshall (MIA, WR) and Josh Freeman (TB, QB). Since the trade, Newton and Manningham have scored 188 points, while Marshall and Freeman have combined for 144 points. That puts my Rebels +44 points ahead on this trade so far.

Oct 1 – Joe’s Pats trade LeGarrette Blount (RB, TB) to sprouts for Antonio Gates (TE, SD) and Steve Smith (WR, Car). Since the trade, Blount has scored 38 points while Gates and Smith have tallied 112. Joe’s Pats are +74 points ahead in this exchange so far. Extra note on this trade… Antonio Gates has scored 38 points since the trade, exactly matching Blount’s total. So basically, Steve Smith was just a bonus in this deal for Joe’s Pats.

Oct 1 – **Blockbuster deal** – Scottish Rebels trade Rashard Mendenhall (RB, Pit), Arian Foster (RB, Hou) and Nate Washington (WR, Ten) to Lords of Lumberg for Adrian Peterson (RB, Min) and Julio Jones (WR, Atl). Since the trade, Mendenhall, Foster and Washington have racked up 224 points, while Peterson and Jones have scored 153. Lords of Lumberg are winning this one by +71 points, so far. Note – The Lords of Lumberg traded Rashard Mendenhall in Week 8 (see next trade), thus was not credited for the 38 points Mendenhall scored in Week 8, 9 and 10. Had Timmy not traded Mendenhall, he would be dominating this trade by +109 points.

Oct 28 – Lords of Lumberg trade Rashard Mendenhall (RB, Pit) to sprouts for Dwayne Bowe (WR, KC) and Mark Ingram (RB, NO). Since this trade, Mendenhall has 38 points while Bowe and Ingram have only totaled 16. That gives sprouts the edge by +22 points in this trade.

Here are a couple of weird stats about the trades this year... All four of these trades involved only four teams in the league, with each team being involved in two deals. All four teams came out ahead in one of the deals and on the short end in the other deal. However, the most amazing stat from all of the trades this year is that SOFA KING GOOD was not involved in a single one!! I remember in years past where James would have made 5 or 6 trades before the start of the season!!

PICK THE WINNERS

There were only four teams that got their picks in for the weekly matchups this week, and the Coors Light Drunk Guys came out as the winner picking 3 of 5 games correctly. Thus, the Drunk Guys were moved to the top of the waiver list this week. This is the first time since Week 2 that we have had a clear-cut winner in the weekly matchup picks. But it looks like Shawn opted to not take advantage of moving ahead 9 spots in the waiver list and did not make any waiver claim this week.

Make sure to pick the winners each week on the Matchups page. You never know when you may need that top waiver spot…

Playoffs?! Don’t talk about playoffs!! PLAYOFFS??!!

It is hard to believe, but there are only three weeks left of the regular season until it is PLAYOFF TIME!! Here is a refresher on the rules of getting into the playoffs: The top two teams in each division automatically qualify for the playoffs. Two wildcards are given to the next two highest ranked teams in overall league standings. (i.e. both wildcard teams can come from the same division.) Division winning teams receive a first round bye. Second place teams will play against wildcard teams starting in Week 14. Here is how standings are determined:

Divisional standings –

• Overall record
• Division record
• Head-to-head record
• Points scored
• If still tied, it will be determined by a coin flip.

Wildcard standings –

• Overall record
• Head-to-head record
• Points scored
• If still tied, it will be determined by a coin flip.

With three games left of the regular season there is only one thing that we know for sure: Moves Like Jagger is in. Other than that, nothing is definite. I started putting together playoff scenarios, but with the multitude of teams with similar records, it is still anyone’s game. There will be complete playoff scenarios next week. Here is the ultra-generic playoff scenario that applies to all teams: In order to make the playoffs, win your remaining games.

BEST BENCH

It wasn’t even close this week… the award for Best Bench for Week 10 goes to – the Lords of Lumberg! With a swap of half of his roster, Timmy could have improved his point total this week by a cool 47 points! He needed to play the Texans for the Chiefs (+18), T. Romo for M. Stafford (+11), S. Holmes for D. Bowe (+11) and R. Bush for J. Battle (+10).

Okay, so after a week with no byes, we have one more week with four teams on their bye week, then the byes are done. (I’m really not sure what the NFL was doing with their schedule this season… I don’t ever recall a one-week break in the bye weeks during the season.) Get your team ready for Week 11!!!

And how about one more Gisele pic... :-)